Books: An Abridged Existence (excerpt)

Just to toy with the lawyer some more, Sid continues his unrecognized and unappreciated sarcasm. “Really? You’ll do all of that for us? For free even? How considerate. And for the record, my bag of peanuts had a warning from the Surgeon General that consumption of this product will cause premature death.” The lawyer obviously does not understand the base concept of ‘sarcasm,’ although he does laugh at the thought of working for free.

“Hahaha! But seriously Sid, I am not helping any of you for my health. I’ve got appetites to fill. My fee will be a nominal 30% off the top. It’s really a great offer. All the other lawyers I know wouldn’t even consider trying to get you a settlement for less than 40% and 500 bucks up front. I’m really doing you a big favor. I’m sure you’ll understand in time. Speaking of which, I’ll take you reply as a yes. I must be off. I just saw a man missing an arm being pushed by in a wheelchair. I’ll be by sometime later with the deal for your settlement. Tell your friends when they awake wont you?”

“But they’re not my friends. I don’t even know them. I never even saw them before today,” which is the truth. He had been staring at the flight time display at the airport from the moment he arrived until the near fatal run in with the peanuts.

“Ah, well, that’s a mere technicality now, isn’t it. Bye.”

The lawyer leaves as quickly as he came. He brought neither health nor happiness. Although he did bring the hope of some easy money. Sid might not have to work gigs for a week or so, although being self employed he would not benefit from any sick days. One of the many downfalls of Sid’s choice at becoming a self employed and taught musician is the lack of paid sick days. And he had been out of work for quite some time.

With the lawyer gone, the room is once again restored to the near tranquility of its former state. The other two people sharing the room are still sleeping and making very little noise. There wasn’t even a clock in the room that Sid can listen to the ticking of to pass the time. So he begins to use his recently renewed vision to look at things.

First he looks at the wall. It is a rather nice, normal, wall. Nothing too out of the ordinary about it. It is free from odd stains of ill patients, drawings of little children, and water damage from leaking pipes. The wall is entirely uninteresting. All the walls are gray in color. A gray that is entirely uninteresting.