Books: An Abridged Existence (excerpt)

“Hey, we could just use yarn, or maybe those really cheap wigs to use as hair. And what if we just used a cloth bag and drew a pace on it for the head?” Sid proposes. It seems like a rather good idea to him. Jen and Carl also concur.

“That sounds great. Hey, I have to go, lunch break is over. I’ll get some clothes and yarn on my way back from work. By the way, how do I get there?” Jen asks Carl. Carl proceeds to give her rather accurate and perfect directions on how to get to his laboratory on the outskirts of the city. “Great, I’ll let you guys get the rest of the things, and even some more clothes, so we can have a greater variety. As well as the hay and newspaper. I’ll see you guys later tonight. Bye.”

“Bye,” Sid and Carl say concurrently.

“Well, I guess that means that we should get busy and go find some stuff for these scarecrows,” Carl says.

“What all are we going to need besides the clothes and the hay and the newspapers?” Sid asks curiously.

“Well, for the internal support of the scarecrows, I think that we could support them with long wooden dowel rods. Probably two for each scarecrow, one going down each leg, and both coming out the top at their heads. I think we should probably get, let’s say, 16 rods. That way we can do at least 8 standing, and possibly have some more scarecrows sitting it we have enough to do that,” Carl explains rapidly, almost too quickly for Sid to comprehend and understand that Carl is talking about scarecrows.

“Uh-hu. Well, in that case, I guess we should head out then?” Sid inquires.

“Indeed, that would be a good idea. It would give us plenty of time to find everything we needed,” responds Carl. They then go to his car and drive off, systematically visiting thrift shops and craft stores, and a few hardware stores as well to find the wooden dowels for the internal support of the skeletons for the scarecrows.

After hitting up 7 thrift stores, 2 craft shops, and 1 hardware store, Carl has to stop to refuel his automobile. He parks the car by the gas pump and exits the car. Sid remains seated in the right front passenger seat, and watches as Carl lifts the nozzle of the gas pump from the holder, and inserts it into the gas tank fueling hole located on the side of the car. While the pump is pumping, Carl gets the squeegee from a nearby wall mount and starts washing the windshield. He starts at the top middle of the windshield on the driver side with the sponge, wiping the solvent and rubbing the dead bugs from his windshield. He slowly works his way down the windshield, and when he reaches the bottom, he turns the sponge squeegee to the squeegee side and starts at the top middle, and works his way across and down, removing the remaining solvent and water from the windshield. He then repeats the wash and squeegee process on the passenger side windshield.